Karsen's MRI

The day of Karsen's MRI went how everything else in this process has gone, rough! Three days before his appointment I get a phone call confirming and also telling me the guidelines to follow for the procedure. Since Karsen had to be put under for the MRI he couldn't have any solid foods after he goes to bed the night before (ok no big deal), and no breast milk 3 hours before the appointment (What?!). Keep in mind the appointment time that we were suppose to be there wasn't the time of his MRI, it was the time to get the ball rolling. Thankfully this time, Kuper was able to go with me. My sister watched Karter since he wasn't allowed to be present, so my mind was at ease knowing he was in good hands. One less thing to worry about. So, off we went again on our three hour drive. Karsen slept most of the way, and was doing ok until we were waiting to be taken back into our room. He was melting down! He was so hungry! Kuper had to hold him because he was getting more and more mad that I was holding him (when he knew I had what he needed) and I wouldn't feed him. It was rough not being able to comfort my baby. Finally, they took us back and got Karsen his little hospital gown to wear. The poor guy had to wear pink... although, I'm not going to lie, he would make a cute baby girl too. I even told Kuper "so this is what our baby would look like if we were to ever have a girl" They let Kuper and I both be in the room when they put him under. They warned us that his body would jerk once he was under but nothing prepared me for the way I felt in those minutes. I held his hand and patted him tummy as he fought falling asleep. I completely broke down once they said he was good. Seeing your baby so lifeless and hooked up to everything is just scary. I cried in Kuper's arms and I told him I should be the one this is happening to not him. He then reminded me if this had happened to me I wouldn't be able to take care of our boys. So true. My husband, my rock, my best friend, always knows what to say to me and when to say it. I don't know what I would do with out him.
As we waited outside in the beautiful outdoor seating the hospital had, I attempted to distract myself by reading the hunger games. It didn't work. I cried some more. Time passed and we started to worry even more. He should have been out in an hour, it had been over two. A million things were running through my mind; did they find something bad, did Karsen have to be intubated, what happened? We talked to a nurse that went to check and see where he was at. She came back with in minutes saying he would be out soon, and warned us that babies at his age can get really disoriented and may not seem themselves for a while. I was so glad she gave us that warning, but it still didn't prepare me enough. When we were finally able to go see Karsen in recovery, I wanted to sprint in. Of course I didn't. When I got there I saw my little man bundled up with cords coming out everywhere. He was cranky and very out of it. When I tried to feed him he was so disoriented he didn't even know how to latch on. I, once again, started crying..... surprise surprise... I was a mess. The staff at the hospital was great. We had two nurses by his side pretty much the whole time. He was the youngest child in the recovery room. Finally, after a few hours and some tylenol (they had to suction his throat when he was under) he was able to eat and get a little bit back to normal. We were free to go home! So thankful that day is over and we wont have to do that again. Got home at midnight, tucked my two little men into bed and crawled into bed myself and was able to actually sleep. Thanked God for keeping my baby safe and thank God for my boys.