Worry wart

Worry wart. It's such an ugly name, but maybe that's why it's ugly. Who really wants to be a worry wart? I don't! Am I? Well, I hate to say it, but yes. When you have a special needs child, and that goes for a child that might just have medical problems, I don't think the worry wart in you ever goes away. It may have its moments of fadding away and moments of shinning bright, but it will always be there. I think as just a mom in general we do that, special needs or not. Every worry is different from each person. For example; my oldest I'm always worrying if he is using good manners, if he throws a fit at preschool, it he is drinking enough fluids. I know, silly, right?! But we do it. Karsen, my latest (yes, I said latest because it is always changing) is the seizures. I recently found that even though you may think your child is seizure free (nothing noticeable) they may in fact still be having those seizures. Grrr! Ok, I've got eyes in the back of my head, side of my head, on my butt, on my feet... you name it, they are there. Kuper and I have been pushing to get Karsen in for a 24 hour EEG rather than a one hour EEG before we take him off his last med he's on. Upon my recent finding, I could not press for this matter any less. I've been a little worried (ok, a lot) that when Karsen has his moments of seeming dazed and confused that his seizures are back. Even though a neuro's naked eye might say he's fine, a mothers intuition can't beat a doctors knowledge. I'm waiting to hear back for our neuro today. I have emailed her already, to no surprise, she already got back to me but was saying we should just schedule a one hour EEG. I emailed her back going into further detail why I wanted a 24 hour instead. Of course I don't want to put Karsen through 24 hours of this but I've felt he really needs it. 

In other news, today Karsen and I got to go for a walk with two of our new friends that we have made through Karsen's group therapy class. Cassidy and her super cute little girl, Ayla. Ayla is just a few months older than Karsen and about the same track in motor skills, maybe a tad bit a head. I'm so happy to have met them both. Some of you know I have a friend with a little girl that is just two weeks younger than Karsen and has hemi cp as well. These friendships have helped me grow and heal to know that what I am feeling and dealing with are normal. They are an amazing outlet. Do you have any special needs mommy friends? Play group was nice and quite today. Just Ayla, Karsen and one other little one. I love it when it's that quite. I think Karsen and I both get a little overwhelmed when it gets loud and crowded. I use to think I handled crowds well, but the older I get the more I find I can't... ha. Maybe it's old age. I swear these kids have made me age an extra 10 years. 

I couldn't help but feel so blessed today. (Not that I'm not other days) I'm blessed that I can stay home with my boys, that my husband is a hard working dedicated husband, and father, that we have a roof over our heads we can call ours, we have two (ok 4 actually, we have a problem;-) running cars, and two beautiful perfect boys that will forever keep me on my toes and keep me worrying. *sigh* What a beautiful life.

Karsen and miss Ayla at play group therapy today.